Family Meetings at Our Live Tree Table
The General’s Conference Room
Historically, having a designated meeting area dates to the Korean War with the “green table.” But it became a symbol during the Vietnam War as a place for negotiations between the US and North Vietnam. It was a table designated to find a peaceful resolution to the conflict.
Having a specified place or table to hold family meetings brings a sense of unity. These meetings are for more than just casual dinner conversations. It is a structured meeting to foster open communication among family members. It should be a safe place where everyone can say what they think and feel as they come together to make decisions and solve issues.
Our table at Belle Hampton is a 10-foot table created from a formerly live black walnut tree. The table has a story as well as a symbol for our meetings.
As we were renovating the first structure on the farm, my husband, Tom, decided to do some yard work. Next to the house, some of the trees looked dead. He removed an ash tree that the emerald ash borer beetle struck. Next to the ash tree was another tree looking afflicted. Not knowing his tree types, Tom proceeded to remove the next one. As he began cutting the tree, the sap started to weep from the trunk. As the inner circles became exposed, it was clear from the rich dark color that he had just killed a prized black walnut tree.
A black walnut tree symbolizes the link between the past and present. How ironic that this was the tree that was destroyed by accident. As new owners of our family’s historic property, Belle Hampton, we planned to restore the historic structures to honor the past, not breaking the ties to its rich history. We felt sadness from the tragic failure of cutting down a tree that stood for generations.
“Failure is another stepping stone to greatness.” -Oprah Winfrey.
But we decided to turn this mistake into a symbol for the future. Failure is inevitable, but how you react to failure is the lesson. We transformed the destroyed tree into a beautiful, live edge 3-inch-thick conference table. As a family, this table is where we sit to discuss and plan the next 200 years of the Hoge Family Legacy at Belle Hampton. Like a black walnut tree that slowly matures, coming into its prime in 150 years, we discuss how we will intentionally grow together as a family and individually live up to our full potential.
Has your family started to have formal meetings? Where do you sit together to discuss the future?
