You grew up with the family name, the legacy, maybe even the wealth, but not the why. No one ever really explained how it all started. The business, the values, the trials, the triumphs, they're all just… vague. You’ve heard fragments over the years, but never the whole picture. If you’re a next-gen family member and this sounds familiar, you’re not alone.

Not knowing your family narrative can feel like trying to write a future without understanding the past. It’s disorienting. But here’s the truth: that missing narrative? It’s more than just lost history; it’s lost identity, lost clarity, and sometimes, lost opportunity.

Let’s unpack why that matters and what you can do about it.

Reminiscing holiday traditions growing up, I think of blessing Easter Baskets, celebrating Christmas Eve at my Bushi’s (Polish grandma) house and enjoying Thanksgiving at my Aunt and Uncle’s. Getting dressed up with black freshly polished patent leather shoes and an Easter bonnet which were all lined up the night before brings back the joyful smells of the day. Since I was the youngest, our large Thanksgiving dinner at my Aunt and Uncle’s had me relegated to the “children’s table” which I never graduated from even in college. In my Bushi’s tiny basement, my dad’s enormous family were cozily scrunched together on folding tables and chairs with a large buffet of Polish delicacies. In hindsight, many of the traditions brought both joy and heartache. Trying to develop traditions that are unifying is an objective for any family, but sometimes unintentional pain is inflicted on a member. How do you avoid the hurt feelings associated with the holiday traditions?

Although I might be biased as a nature lover, mockingbirds are fascinating creatures. These birds cause no pain to anyone or anything—they just sing, continuously. Chosen as a book title, To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee, the bird is a figurative representation of the loss of innocence. Quoting from the book, “Mockingbirds don’t do one thing but . . . sing their hearts out for us. That’s why it’s a sin to kill a mockingbird.”  The overall theme in To Kill a Mockingbird is that every human being deserves to be treated with dignity. What a wonderful message for today’s world, everyone deserves dignity.

If your home address is number 42, it might be significant to you if you have seen the movie,  “The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy” by Douglas Adams. In the movie, 42 was the answer to the Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe, and Everything. Although this was a symbolic number in the movie, it might not resonate with you. Numbers, however, can have a lot of meaning for different people. When it comes to your dream home, having an ordinary number amongst the masses might not be the answer to the “Ultimate Question of Everything.” How do you make your dream home a place symbolizing your family story, values or significance for many generations to come?

My parents would often take the family on a vacation for a festive celebration with all of the spouses and grand-kids included.  This group would amount to 30 people which were often spotted in t-shirts that matched, a gift from the grandparents designed specifically to memorialize the occasion. Pictures from the trip with everyone in similar shirts would be preserved for generations.  We would spy other groups on the trip with a similar idea.  Most had similar themes of the family name, the trip location and year of the event.  Like us, some had a family/business logo or other symbol designed to feel the comradely among family members. Although t-shirts are great, many families are looking for more unique ways they can create a bond with their family.

Stories often die with the person and lost forever.  When I ask people about writing their story they often say that their life isn't that interesting or who would want to read it?  I truly believe everyone has a story to tell; a lesson to pass along to future generations.  The struggles, the passion, the failure and their success gives future generations perspective in this fast paced world.

One of those tall tale stories was about my Great Grandpa Adam in 1912.  He was at work at the sugar refinery and the entire factory erupted with an explosion and collapsed into rubble and fire. Wives and families arrived at the scene looking for their husbands and sons. Many were killed. The explosion threw some into St. Mary’s Cemetery adjoining the refinery. Others could not be found, including grandpa. Some five or six hours after Marie, his wife, arrived back home, Grandpa Adam walked back into the house, where he told an incredible story.