You grew up with the family name, the legacy, maybe even the wealth, but not the why. No one ever really explained how it all started. The business, the values, the trials, the triumphs, they're all just… vague. You’ve heard fragments over the years, but never the whole picture. If you’re a next-gen family member and this sounds familiar, you’re not alone.

Not knowing your family narrative can feel like trying to write a future without understanding the past. It’s disorienting. But here’s the truth: that missing narrative? It’s more than just lost history; it’s lost identity, lost clarity, and sometimes, lost opportunity.

Let’s unpack why that matters and what you can do about it.

When we acquired Belle Hampton Farm from a cousin, my curiosity was piqued by the collection of old textbooks in the library, spanning subjects from science and math to history. Some bore the signatures of James Hoge Tyler, while others were signed by his children. Intrigued, I embarked on an investigation into a school supposedly integrated into the farm. From Governor Tyler’s diary, I knew that family members had tutored the youth, but I couldn't shake the feeling that there was more to uncover. I wasn’t sure of its exact location, but a school listed as part of the farm caught my attention. Here’s what I discovered.

Wait… Aren’t They All the Same Thing?

On the surface, knowledge, education, and Googling might feel interchangeable. You go to school to get an education, you read stuff online to gain knowledge, and when you don’t know something—hey, just Google it!

But hang tight. These terms are connected, yes, but not identical. Each plays a unique role in how we learn, understand, and make decisions in the modern world.

Let’s dive into each one, shall we?

Are you thinking about holding family meetings? Perhaps your financial advisor suggested it, or you’ve heard about other families that have found them beneficial. While getting started may seem straightforward, it's important to understand their value, how to conduct them, and the benefits they offer. In our experience, initiating family meetings has significantly improved our lives.

This blog presents 14 creative and engaging activities to help you set and achieve your biggest goals. From vision boarding and life wheel assessments to backward planning and accountability systems, these strategies make goal setting practical and inspiring. Activities like bucket list creation and time capsules encourage dreaming big, while tools such as obstacle mapping and goal ladders break ambitions into manageable steps. Whether you’re reflecting during an annual retreat or celebrating milestones with rewards, these methods guide you toward turning aspirations into actionable plans. Start your journey to success with these innovative approaches!

Money—it’s so much more than just numbers in the red or black. But what if the real power of money lies in the yellow zone: how it’s used? This blog explores the idea that money is most meaningful when it serves as a tool for purpose, value, and change.

Can happiness really be measured? Drawing from the wisdom in Build the Life You Want by Arthur C. Brooks and Oprah Winfrey, this blog explores actionable strategies to assess your joy, create meaningful habits, and build a life of true fulfillment.

As an author and avid reader, I have become frustrated with my recent book choices. Some were even recommendations from colleagues, but unfortunately, they disappointed me. After 22 hours of listening to an audiobook and waiting for it to improve, I had enough. Before I read the next book, I will assess it critically. I want to avoid books with authors trying to push specific agendas or political views leaning too heavily in one direction. I am looking for books in various genres that help me develop different forms of knowledge to enhance my personal growth and reach my full potential.

During our family gatherings, we have what I like to call "Table Topics." These are discussion questions meant to spark thoughtful conversations and bring our family closer together. The purpose of these topics is to help us grow as a family, improve communication, and gain insights from multiple generations.

Preparing the next generation for the future is a significant challenge for families and family enterprises. It involves ensuring the continuation of the family and preserving its legacy. We have developed a structured approach based on the Family Balance Sheet philosophy to address this complex task.

Consider this: your family's health might be the most valuable asset you're overlooking. Human capital embodies more than just our skills and abilities in our rapidly evolving world. It encompasses our physical and emotional well-being, capacity to seek fulfilling work, and pursuit of personal happiness and a positive sense of identity. Health is a crucial part of human capital, and experts agree that prioritizing our well-being enhances productivity and promotes growth and stability for ourselves and our loved ones. Let's strive to cultivate our human capital and unlock our full potential!

The Reynolds family is well-known for their contribution to the American tobacco industry. They are a classic example of how a family can rise to affluence and fall in three generations. The success of the R.J. Reynolds Tobacco Company is linked to their story, providing insight into the immense wealth that the tobacco market could generate. However, as their fortune grew, their private and public lives became more complex. The concept of the Gilded Leaf represents the opulence of their lifestyle and the hidden challenges beneath the surface. This blog delves into the Reynolds family's vast economic wealth and the profound personal and family tragedies that their wealth caused.

Pruning a tree involves selectively removing branches or parts of the tree for various purposes, such as improving the tree's health. Sometimes, we need to prune our family tree for the same reason. No, I am not saying you need to cut off a family branch because of interpersonal conflicts that may arise. That is a topic for another time. It might be time to prune even if your tree has flourished for multiple generations. The question to ask yourself is, are you only a passenger on the family’s journey or the driver? Are you letting the rising generation take their wheel?

"Commencement" is a term used to describe the ceremony where students receive their academic degrees or diplomas, marking the beginning of their transition from students to graduates. However, my journey into the history and lives of the Hoge and Howe families began with my son's graduation from Virginia Tech.

Our son, Peyton, is a fourth-generation graduate of Virginia Tech. He could have been the fifth generation, but my husband and I went to Georgia Tech instead. But that is a story for another day.

How do you give back? Last week, Brad Formsma spoke at the Southeast Family Office Forum (SEFOF). He is the author of the book I Like Giving. He gave us practical ideas on how to give. There are seven ways to live generously: Words, Thoughts, Influence, Time, Attention, Belonging, and Money. He asked how can we incorporate giving into everyday life and inspire others to do the same. Through his stories of “I like _____” he showed us examples of how to give.

The "shirtsleeves to shirtsleeves" saying is an all too common phenomenon.  Statistics show us that 70% of wealth transfers fail. It was very problematic in history, but even more of a concern with the anticipation of the Greatest Wealth Transfer in history soon arriving. But instead of focusing on the failures, how does the next generation succeed in this transfer?

Have you made your resolutions for 2024? Did you know, by definition, that a resolution is a firm decision to do or not to do something? Some common resolutions are to exercise more, lose weight, get organized, learn a new skill or hobby, save more money, or quit smoking. But how many people give up on their resolutions only after one month? The number is 43%, which doesn’t sound very resolute. One of the reasons for letting go of a resolution is that it isn’t a priority.

Do you ever feel that everything is going so well, but you are waiting for that other shoe to drop, that ominous feeling things are too good? This morning I heard a loud bang on our glass door. Since we live out in the country, I knew it wasn’t someone knocking hard. Although I initially dismissed it, our dog did not. He found the remnants of a dead bird lying on our porch. Generally, a dead bird is a bad omen that someone is about to die or something in your life will end. It is human nature to think the worse, but why not celebrate success instead of waiting for doom and gloom? Yes, there will be setbacks, the other shoe dropping or a bird, but celebrating along the way will give you the resilience to achieve your life goals so you can live up to your full potential.

Schooling is only part of having a growth mindset.  If you have a degree but didn't learn anything, you aren't growing.  I know young adults who spent 5, 6, or 7 years getting a piece of paper only to be left unemployable and in debt.  Growing in knowledge is the objective.  Knowledge incorporates skill, understanding, and acumen.  It comes from learning and experiencing inside and outside a formal environment.  Recognize that the core values of resilience, persistence, and making mistakes are part of gaining knowledge.  Creating a growth mindset in your family must begin with a plan.

To break the cycle of "Shirt Sleeves to Shirt Sleeves" in three generations, as discussed in a previous blog, family businesses and those wanting to pass along wealth must stop the current way of managing money.  A 70% failure rate in a successful transfer of wealth is not good odds.  Financial planning should not begin with wealth advisors but with a family bank structure.