Although most family patriarch’s have wills and many have worked with a financial advisors or family offices on estate plans, a typical family doesn’t cultivate a strategic plan for future generations. Consider the statistic, 70% of all wealth transfers fail after one generation and 97% fail after three generations. That nest egg you built over your life, no matter how big or small, disappears shortly after you do. Historically 86% of families consider it more important to leave values and life lessons as inheritance. Unfortunately, financial advisors don’t ordinarily touch on non-financial legacy. For those who have a plan, 90% believe it doesn’t deal with their goals, wants and objectives. But is it essential to have a strategic plan, how is one created and who do you turn to for advice?

If your home address is number 42, it might be significant to you if you have seen the movie,  “The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy” by Douglas Adams. In the movie, 42 was the answer to the Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe, and Everything. Although this was a symbolic number in the movie, it might not resonate with you. Numbers, however, can have a lot of meaning for different people. When it comes to your dream home, having an ordinary number amongst the masses might not be the answer to the “Ultimate Question of Everything.” How do you make your dream home a place symbolizing your family story, values or significance for many generations to come?

Our family’s journey started five years ago when we bought Belle-Hampton Farm. We have since restored the Bank Barn, the Cottage, the General’s Store and now the Belle-Hampton House. All the structures are historic landmarks which takes time and thought to the planning the renovations. But did we actually restore the structures or renovate them? And why is it important to preserve the historic structures?

What does Henry Ford, Charles Schwab, Richard Branson, David Murdock, Steve Jobs, Ted Turner, Walt Disney and Nelson Rockefeller have in common? If you guessed they are all entrepreneurs or all millionaires, you would be right. But you might not have realized they are all Dyslexic, the new superpower or as some researchers say, a “desired difficulty”.

After reading various articles on how family businesses can accommodate this disability, I became confused then irritated. Why did the authors think it was a problem that had to be fixed instead of a gift to be nourished? And why did so many successful businesspeople flourish when society believes it is a disability?

Sharing history of the family or the family business doesn’t have to be dull, divisive or disregarded. It starts with a little preparation to elicit ancestral tales and delightful personal stories. A bit of creative flair can start a conversation leading to a remembrance of life lessons and values to be passed down to future generations. To keep the discussion appealing, start with the presentation. Here are some ideas:

Perpetuating family bonds into the future generations including the history, the core values, traditions and memories can be a challenge as a business family grows and time marches on. Typically, a family will keep a scrap book with pictures, but sometimes the person holding those pictures pass away before the names and story is written down. A senior family member may have spent time working on a family tree that the next generation pays little attention to. Often, I hear elder members say they should write an autobiography, but never seem to get something written down. How do you preserve all of these everyday, ordinary stories, reflecting values, traditions and keep the family bonds strong?

To understand the life stories of those who lived at Belle-Hampton and neighboring Sunnyside, we need to begin with a brief history of their ancesters. Prominent names such as De Jarnette, Shannon, Cecil and Trollinger are all buried in the Sunnyside cemetery, however, the main families we will be discussing at length are Hoge and Howe who's descendants are intertwined. Both the Hoge's and the Howe's were the progenitors of their family in the New River Valley. Joseph Howe was engaged in blazing the Catawba trail in 1750 and moved to Sunnyside shortly after along with James Hoge. But their families came across the pond much earlier.

My parents would often take the family on a vacation for a festive celebration with all of the spouses and grand-kids included.  This group would amount to 30 people which were often spotted in t-shirts that matched, a gift from the grandparents designed specifically to memorialize the occasion. Pictures from the trip with everyone in similar shirts would be preserved for generations.  We would spy other groups on the trip with a similar idea.  Most had similar themes of the family name, the trip location and year of the event.  Like us, some had a family/business logo or other symbol designed to feel the comradely among family members. Although t-shirts are great, many families are looking for more unique ways they can create a bond with their family.

Stories often die with the person and lost forever.  When I ask people about writing their story they often say that their life isn't that interesting or who would want to read it?  I truly believe everyone has a story to tell; a lesson to pass along to future generations.  The struggles, the passion, the failure and their success gives future generations perspective in this fast paced world.

One of those tall tale stories was about my Great Grandpa Adam in 1912.  He was at work at the sugar refinery and the entire factory erupted with an explosion and collapsed into rubble and fire. Wives and families arrived at the scene looking for their husbands and sons. Many were killed. The explosion threw some into St. Mary’s Cemetery adjoining the refinery. Others could not be found, including grandpa. Some five or six hours after Marie, his wife, arrived back home, Grandpa Adam walked back into the house, where he told an incredible story.